The Creative Crockpot of Christopher Olson

Toews Should Be Fired

I’m sitting around a boardroom table, talking with my fellow managers at my company. The staff of my department has drawn up a plan to help the company combat worker theft. I pitch this plan as a progressive and necessary way to deal with the very real threat of worker theft.

One of my colleagues pipes up.

“Look I have some concerns that this might be violating our workers privacy, it might be going to far, and might even be illegal.”

Standing up, I launch into defense of my plan, “We NEED this plan. Without this plan, our company will go bankrupt, and the people stealing from us, they’ll then use the items they stole to then come to our houses and steal from and victimize our children.”

My colleague, a little taken aback, “I think that’s an extreme response, I just have concerns your plan goes too far…”

“You’re either with us, or the child pornographers!” I reply heatedly.

Several days pass. My boss invites me into his office. He clears his throat.

“I can’t help but notice your plan involved installing cameras and microphones in the bathrooms, change rooms, and inside the seams of the uniforms of employees,” my boss says.

“What? Really? That’s the first I’ve heard of it,” I reply. “I’m pretty certain I’m not expanding the powers of our security department that much.”

“Did you read this thing?” he asks. “It pretty clearly defines the new powers, saying cameras are to be put everywhere. I can read you the relevant section if you like,” he responds.

“Well, I really only read the cliff notes. I didn’t really know about that,” I reply, only mildly apologetically.

***************************************

You know what would happen next?

My boss would fire me. Rightfully so. Because I didn’t know what my department was doing, I didn’t know what was in the plan I was backing, and because I completely embarrassed myself, my department, and if it ever went public, my company.

Will Vic Toews be removed from his portfolio. Unlikely. Should he? Yes, immediately. He should then resign his seat, and a by-election should be held in his riding, because there is no way any constituent in their right mind would still have confidence in Vic Toews, and that’s how our government works. The government works until it has lost the confidence of the people.

And Vic Toews, clearly demonstrated he’s not competent enough to be working for Canadians.

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